a blog by lucas, human person

I think that we all think about our health too much. what has come from our constant surveillance and inquiry?

I think the most potent impact is that it stops us from living freely.

I would rather just live. Not everything that I do is going to be healthy. Who cares? it’s life. it is meant to be lived and enjoyed. not tracked, monitored, and made more efficient. 

a night of poor sleep (short duration, low quality, probably determined by REM cycles or something) can have impacts on your metabolic efficiency. that is a conversation that I recently had. 

I ask now what I was not rude enough to ask then. Who f*cking cares? 

the reality is that that is a very important thing for us to know for the sake of those who live lives that prevent their access to regular, restful sleep. Those working more than one job. those who work overnight shifts. we should look out for these people. its good for us to know that sleep quality will have impacts on health . We should aim to do something to mitigate that for these people. to improve their working conditions. to ensure they have access to good health care. to support them financially. 

but thats not what we do with that information. 

no. what do we do?

what we do, as privileged little demons, is worry about whether or not we’re getting the best sleep possible. we buy watches to measure it and track it. pills and powders to lull us to sleep. expensive lights. noise makers. we purchase “solutions.” 

we think too much about the minutiae of health, we worry about it and about what it means, what it says about us, and then we get weird.

if I cared about achieving the highest possible health status for myself that I could, I would have to remove myself from community, from connection with others. 

if I require 8-9 uninterrupted hours of sleep a night (for my health), I certainly can’t sleep next to another person, let alone a pet. I cannot make late night, or likely evening plans. 

if we go down the rabbit hole of improving sleep quality, then we need to talk about nighttime routines, room temperature, light exposure, stimulation. you’ll end up deciding you need a whole hour to prepare for bed. 

and so your pursuit draws you away from your life. from staying up late talking about the future with your partner. from inviting your dog up onto the bed. from falling asleep on the couch during a movie. from spontaneously going for a drink with an old friend in town. 

because you have to prioritize your sleep hygiene, obviously. 

and you quickly start to paint a picture with very ugly colors.

sure, you can aim to live a “healthy” life. but emphasis on the life part.